Arrest Reports

The following arrests were made by local law enforcement agencies.

03/05/23

Coby Payne of Jamestown, LA was arrested for domestic abuse battery with child endangerment.

03/06/23

Tysha Montgomery from Grand Prairie, TX was arrested for criminal conspiracy, possession of marijuana with intent to distribute, distribution of Robitussin with codeine, illegal use of a controlled substance in the presence of persons under the age of 17 and two counts of contributing the the delinquency of juveniles.  

Kevin Collins of Monroe, LA was arrested as a fugitive for operating a vehicle with a suspended license/no license issued, bank fraud, misinterpretation during booking, resisting an officer and violation of probation/parole. 

Shelby Walker of Columbia, LA was arrested as a fugitive for bank fraud, and possession or distribution of drug paraphernalia. 

Zahrek Patton from Fort Worth, TX was arrested as a fugitive for resisting an officer, possession of marijuana with intent to distribute, distribution of Robitussin with codeine, illegal use of a controlled drug in the presence of persons under the age of 17 and two counts of contributing to the delinquency of juveniles. 

Patrick Gowdy of Princeton, LA was arrested for illegal possession of stolen things. 

03/07/23

Nicole Hullaby of Gibsland, LA was arrested for no driver’s license. 

Roger Shoemaker of Monroe, LA was arrested as a fugitive for illegal possession of stolen things, possession of alcoholic beverages in a motor vehicle, speeding, operating a vehicle with a suspended license, aggravated flight from an officer and resisting an officer.

03/08/23

Theresa Jackson of Arcadia, LA was arrested for failure to appear – execution of sentence. 

03/09/23

Francisco Rosa Gutierrez from Marshall, TX was arrested for no driver’s license. 

Kathleen Strong of Ringgold, LA was arrested as a fugitive for disturbing the peace by the use of offensive, derisive and/or annoying words to another and entering or remaining after being forbidden.

Kevin Hawkins of Bastrop, LA was arrested for operating a vehicle with a suspended license. 

Lashawn Smith of Monroe, LA was arrested for failure to appear warrant. 

03/10/23

Johnny Burns of Homer, LA was arrested for first offense D.W.I.

03/11/23

Jeffery Brown of Castor, LA was arrested for theft. 


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Notice of Death – March 14


Notice of Death – March 14, 2023

Valda Ruth Matthews

Dec. 1, 1936 – March 12, 2023

Minden/Ringgold

Visitation: 10 a.m. Wednesday, March 15, 2023, Rose-Neath Funeral Home Chapel, Minden.

Funeral service: 11 a.m. immediately following visitation.

Burial: Social Springs Cemetery, Ringgold, La.

Joe Bill Gamble

Dec. 7, 1954 – March 6, 2023

Doyline/Minden

Memorial service: 3 p.m. Thursday, March 16, 2023, VFW Hunter-Rickerson Post #2885, 232 Horseshoe Loop, Doyline, La.

Bienville Parish Journal publishes paid complete obituaries – unlimited words and a photo, as well as unlimited access – $80. Contact your funeral provider or bpjnewsla@gmail.com . Must be paid in advance of publication. (Above death notices are free of charge.)

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Sapp speaks on urgent need for emergency route at Arcadia School Complex

By Paige Nash  

Arcadia property owner Douglas Sapp attended the Bienville Parish Police Jury Meeting held on Wednesday, March 8, to urge the jury to consider adding an emergency travel route for the Arcadia School Complex. 

The school is currently located on a dead-end road at 967 Daniel Street, with only one way to enter or exit the property. Sapp expressed his concern for this issue explaining the urgency in providing an alternative route for the students, faculty and staff in the event that there is ever an emergency at the school. 

There have been two previous attempts to have an emergency egress formed in the past, but those attempts never progressed past the planning stages.  

“The school has been there for over 40 years and there has always been a concern with the school being located on this dead-end street,” said Sapp. “In this day in time in which we live it is critical for all local, state and federal governments, along with the citizens of Arcadia to enter this discussion concerning planning, development and funding of this much needed emergency egress for our school complex. The sense of urgency is now.” 

Sapp owns a portion of the property located in front of the Arcadia School Complex. He has also received clearance and agreements from the Lamar-Caskey family, who also own a portion of property near the school, to join in on this effort. Both families are willing to give up the right of way to their land for this project to be completed.  

Sapp provided the jury with maps laying out and explaining the options for the emergency egress and explained that there are grants available to help fund such a project.  

“I am on board with you,” said BPPJ President Jerry Bates. “Our engineer, Robert George, is sitting back there and he is the gentleman that goes after all of our grants. I would like for him to overview this packet and we will look into this.” 

Sapp expressed that the completion of this project would have a higher chance of achievement if all local governments collaborated. Sapp has already met with Mayor of Arcadia O’Landis Millican, as well as school board representatives and members of the Louisiana DOTD. 

“This mission can be accomplished with all entities on deck to make sure that this project comes to fruition. This is something I would like to see done. It has been talked about and talked about and I think the season is now and is long overdue, so I would just appreciate the cooperation of all local government entities.” said Sapp.  

After further review of the information provided by Sapp and an investigation is completed on grant funding by the jury’s engineer, the jury will enter further discussion in the near future regarding implementation of this project.  


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Free service provided for the elderly and homebound residents in Bienville Parish

Bienville Parish Sheriff John Ballance partnered with the Bienville Council on Aging to implement a computer aided dialing system called RUOK (Are you ok).

This system is designed to check on elderly and homebound residents on a daily basis. Those who subscribe to this system will be called via the computer aided phone system to establish contact by phone. If there is no answer after three attempts, an emergency contact will be made. If there is no response to the dispatcher’s call, a Bienville Parish deputy will be dispatched to the subscriber’s residence.

“This will hopefully give our elderly citizens and homebound peace of mind that they are not alone and that our office is concerned about their safety and well-being,” said Ballance.

This service is free of charge to individuals who subscribe. To sign up for this service, you may pick up a form at your local Council on Aging office or contact the sheriff’s office for assistance in receiving a form at 318-263-2215. The simple questionnaire only requires basic information including name, age, address, phone numbers, list of health issues and emergency contact information.


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Saline Bobcats fall to Southwood

Saline Varsity Bobcats struggled to get their offense going on Thursday, getting easily dispatched by Southwood, 13-5.

Southwood took an early lead in the second inning. An error scored two runs for Southwood.

Southwood took the lead for good with six runs in the fourth inning. In the fourth Contrell Ross-Hall singled on the first pitch of the at bat, scoring one run, an error scored one run for Southwood, Jaydenn Booker singled on a 2-0 count, scoring one run, Kaiden Snelgrove singled on a 2-1 count, scoring one run, and Brayden Harrington singled on a 1-2 count, scoring two runs.

Will Dison led things off on the pitcher’s mound for Saline Varsity Bobcats. Dison went three innings, allowing four runs on three hits, striking out one and walking one. Shawn Staggs threw three innings in relief out of the bullpen.

Saline Varsity Bobcats scattered seven hits in the game. Braxton Davis, Jacob Jones, and Staggs each had multiple hits for Saline Varsity Bobcats. Davis led Saline Varsity Bobcats with three hits in three at bats.

Southwood totaled 12 hits in the game. Cody Snelgrove, Snelgrove, and Kollin Best each managed multiple hits for Southwood.

(“Powered by Narrative Science and GameChanger Media.” Any reuse or republication of this story must include the preceding attribution.)


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New Emergency Medical Responder graduates

The Bienville Fire District 4 and 5 department recently hosted a unified Emergency Medical Responder class with multiple agencies represented.
 
This class took the participants two months to accomplish. Pending completion of their state paperwork, they will be ready to provide the community within the district and parish with pre-hospital emergency care. 
 
Congratulations to the following:
 
Kennedy Davis Hudson-Bienville Fire
Conner Webb-Bienville Fire
Chad Webb-Bienville Fire
David Kirkham-Bienville Fire
Louie Foerster-Bienville Fire
Jessica L. Conly-Bienville Fire
Gabe Dabbs-Bienville Fire
Abigail Dabbs-Bienville Fire
Steve Wilsek-BPSO
Scott Gill-BPSO
Tanner Madden-BPSO
Maggie Straight-Bienville Fire
Connor Straight-Bienville Fire
Jake Wilhite-Bienville Fire
Hailey Dabbs-Bienville Fire
Jared McConnell-Bienville Fire
Sarah Tullis Myers-Bienville Fire
Jimmy Woodard-Bienville Fire
Lewis Moore-Bienville Fire


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HSLA looking for funding to construct or rebuild animal shelters

The Humane Society of Louisiana (HSLA) will be urging lawmakers during the upcoming legislative session to earmark funds to construct new animal shelters and renovate existing ones. The group has been campaigning to improve the state’s animal sheltering infrastructure for more than 35 years and has documented the need to provide more funding to support public animal shelters. A report published by the State Legislative Auditor’s Office reached a similar conclusion. Its 58-page report, published and distributed in 2021, details the need for the state to become more active on the local level and provide more resources. A copy of the report can be read here:

The State of Louisiana’s Role in Animal Welfare and Control Activities.

According to HSLA, more than 30 of the state’s 64 parishes lack parish-wide facilities, which leaves millions of residents without basic animal control services and contributes to stray animals breeding indiscriminately, living on the streets and back roads trying to survive.

“The majority of our rural parishes, including Avoyelles, Bienville, Evangeline, Catahoula, E. Feliciana, Franklin, Livingston, St. Helena, St. James, Caldwell, Red River, Union, and more than a dozen other parishes, have no means to pick up or house stray animals,” HSLA Director Jeff Dorson said.

“Animal control is an essential service, much like police and fire protection. So, imagine half of our state operating without even basic services. This means that there is no agency to call if an animal is in distress, lost, found, or injured. We simply have to do better.”

Rural administrators say that there is no money to build or maintain shelters, so HSLA has been meeting with state officials to establish a Shelter Construction and Repair Fund. The idea is not new. New York lawmakers have been distributing millions of dollars each year through its Companion Animal Capital Projects Fund to public and private shelters for the past several years. This year, Governor Hochul announced that more than $7 million would be distributed to eligible shelters to renovate and improve existing shelters. 

The Humane Society is asking Governor Edwards and legislators to set aside $3 million for Louisiana’s newly-created program, which would be administered under the La. Dept. of Agriculture’s Animal Control Advisory Task Force (https://lacatf.la.gov/). Members of the Task Force inspect public shelters at least once a year and encourage them to comply with best practices and accepted industry standards—both structurally and operationally. The $3 million could be distributed as grants of up to $100,000 to eligible parishes and municipalities.

“The need to build new shelters and upgrade existing shelters is greatly needed and much overdue,” Dorson said. “We are grateful, however, that the LDAF and the Governor’s Office readily agree with that assessment and see the need to fund this new program. Our job will be to ensure that these funds are included in a supplemental appropriations bill and remain in place during the legislative session until it is signed into law by the governor.”

This year’s legislative session starts April 10.


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Saline Baseball and Softball Tournaments this weekend

The Saline High School Bobcats and Lady Bobcats will be hosting a softball and baseball tournament this weekend at the high school located at 1255 Cooper Street in Saline. 

The softball tournament will kick-off today, March 10, at 3:30 p.m. The schedule is as follows:

Friday, March 10

SHS vs. Southwood at 3:30 p.m.

Simsboro vs. Lakeview at 5:15 p.m.

Southwood vs. Jonesboro-Hodge at 7:00 p.m.

SHS vs. Ringgold at 8:45 p.m.

Saturday, March 11

Mansfield vs. Simsboro at 9 a.m.

SHS vs. Mansfield at 10:45 a.m.

Jonesboro Hodge vs. Ringgold at 12:30 p.m.

Lakeview vs. Red River at 2:15 p.m.

Lakeview vs. Jonesboro Hodge at 4 p.m.

SHS vs. Red River at 5:45 p.m.

The baseball tournament will also begin today and the schedule is as follows:

Friday, March 10 

Wossman vs. Lincoln Prep at 3:30 p.m.

Arcadia vs. Simsboro at 5:15 p.m.

Ringgold vs. Jonesboro Hodge at 7 p.m.

Saline vs. Lakeview at 8:45 p.m.

Saturday, March 11

Saline vs. Arcadia at 1 p.m.

Lincoln Prep vs. Ringgold at 2:45 p.m.

Jonesboro Hodge vs. Lakeview at 4:30 p.m.

Saline vs. Wossman at 6:15 p.m.


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LQHBA Scholarship Opportunity

Join us for the Mardi Gras Futurity and Louisiana Downs Futurity at Louisiana Downs on Saturday, March 25, 2023

Three scholarships will be awarded through a LIVE drawing in the Louisiana Downs winner’s circle on Saturday, March 25th, immediately following the 4th race.

Applicants must register in person beginning at 11:00 a.m. on Saturday, March 25, 2023.

Registration will close promptly after the third race.

ENTRANTS MUST BE PRESENT TO WIN.

For more information on the scholarship eligibility or the rules, please see the attached flyer or visit LQHBA.COM


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Not a victim, but a survivor Part 2

I should start off this week by saying some of this content may be triggering. I now know that I should have preceded my column last week with this warning and I am sorry that I did not. Being that I have never openly spoken about my abuse, I did not think about it being necessary. I know that now. 

Overwhelmingly the response I received last week was well taken. Although I was baffled by how many people came to me after the publication expressing that they too had experienced similar situations. I am glad that I was able to reach those, and I hope that by continuing to share my story that it will help in my healing journey, as well as others. That was honestly my entire intention. I am sorrowful that so many people (young and old, men and women) experienced traumatic situations, but at the same time I am relieved to know that there are others out there, many of whom I know personally, that are now aware we can lean on each other for support in the future if we ever need it.  

I did receive one comment asking how this pertained to being a mother or parenting. I know that I strayed from my usual content regarding those subjects, and I did not touch on this in my last column, but going through some of the things I did as a child most definitely affects my parenting and my motherhood journey, so I just wanted to take some time today to touch on that, then next week we can get back to the not so heavy stuff.  

I may have experienced sexual abuse over 20 years ago, but it is something I carry with me every day and something that weighs on my mind any and every single time my children are out of my sight. Any given day that I am dropping them off at school or an extracurricular, I find myself praying to God to please protect them. I pray for Him to protect them physically from accidents and from people who wish them harm. I also pray that He will protect them mentally and spiritually, as well. I pray that they have the chance to remain innocent for as long as possible, something that got taken away from me way too soon. 

My oldest is now 9 years old, almost the same exact age I was when my abuse began. There is no possible way that I cannot consider that. I know that I cannot protect them all the time, but what I can do is use my knowledge, experiences and research to give them a better shot.  

I began speaking on this subject with Emerson as soon as I thought she was old enough to hear and understand me, which was about 3 years old. Her father and I split up when she was about 6 months old, and we began sharing custody of her right about that age. I used to cry myself to sleep every single night knowing that I could not be there to protect her. The worst part for me, along with just being away from her at such an early age, was knowing that she was too young to speak up or even understand if something bad happened. It wasn’t that I thought her father could not care for her. He has always been a very active, caring and responsible father. It was just the fact that I had zero control. 

When she was old enough though I opened this line of discussion with her. We did not make the whole conversation about sexual assault, but about safety in general. We talked about her body, not keeping secrets and reassuring messages that she would not get in trouble if something were to ever happen.  

I now have these same conversations with my four-year-old and I will have the same ones with my youngest in a year or so. These conversations can be challenging. They are not always comfortable, but they are crucial.  

As the girls have gotten older, we have revisited the subject and I feel pretty confident that they would confide in me if something did ever happen, God forbid. But they would not ever know that they needed to if we did not have those discussions.

I encourage every parent or guardian to consider having these hard conversations with your children, no matter their age or gender. I do not want you to think that I am lecturing you, but in the world we are living in today, you cannot be too guarded when it comes to protecting your little ones.  

Rainn.org has an abundance of information when it comes to speaking with your child about sexual abuse as well as warning signs to look for. It also serves as a 24/7 National Sexual Assault Hotline that is free and confidential. 

(Paige Nash is a wife, mom, digital journalist for Webster Parish Journal and publisher of Bienville Parish Journal.)


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Bug Out Bags

Bug out bag – go bag -survival bag – I’ve heard several different terms for a pre-packed bag that one might keep handy in the event they need to up and leave their current situation in a hurry.  If you ask the most hard-core prepper, all the different labels have specific meanings, but I’m not that guy – I tend to use all the terms interchangeably, which is probably wrong, but unless we’re having the “clip vs magazine” debate, I try not to get wrapped around the axel about vernacular.

So, what is a “bug out bag?”  Simply put, it’s a satchel of some kind that is ready to go at a moment’s notice.  I keep one of these kits with most of the time, and I would encourage others to do the same.  They need not be extravagant, although you can certainly sink a lot of money into them.  I’ve found over the years that it’s actually pretty easy to rack up a hefty tab when trying to put one of these kits together, even though spending a fortune isn’t necessarily necessary.  See what I did there?  Anyway, let’s talk bag packing specifics.

First, let’s discuss the bag itself.  My personal recommendation is that you don’t skimp on this item.  Invest in a quality bag.  Buy once cry once.  This thing needs to be sturdy.  It’s likely going to get tossed around a lot even if you never use it in an emergency.  So, it can’t be a wimpy thing.  It also needs to be comfortable to carry because you might be toting this thing a long way.  Having your back and shoulders on fire within the first mile of an emergency trek is not good.  Contrary to popular belief, size isn’t everything.  You don’t have to have the biggest pack, as long as it’ll perform when you need it most.  Although the bag itself is a highly important part of the kit, you should buy it last.  Buy everything you need / want to go in the bag first and pile it all up on your wife’s dining table.  Look at the size of the pile, marvel at your survival prowess for a moment, and then go buy a bag sized for the contents you selected.  Otherwise, you’ll end up overfilling whatever bag you purchase, causing it to resemble a Sumo wrestler in skinny jeans.  If you over-stuff the bag, then it won’t be functional.

Some of the items in your bag will, and should, be situationally dependent.  Whatever environment you’re in, or that you’re heading into, will determine some of your needs.  Urban environment or wilderness?  Desert or mountains?  Hot climate or cold?  Pack your bag accordingly and change it up when circumstances dictate new necessities.  The less you know about where you’re going, or where you might end up, the more options you need to prepare for.

When I pack a bug out bag, I pack a bag I can live out of for 48 hours.  Professional preppers would tell me that means I’ll die in the 49th hour, but I don’t usually traverse very far outside a known area.  I’m not suggesting you follow my example – it’s just what I choose to do.  That said, let’s discuss some items that are necessary, regardless of geographical location, and see what we can… unpack.  Oh, how I love a good pun.

  1. Water.  Water is heavy.  You likely can’t carry much of it over any long distance but without it, you’ll die, like so fast.  I generally pack two, 20oz bottles of water.  It’s not “enough,” but I could survive off that for two days if I had to.  A water filtration device is a good option, especially if you might be away from civilization for a long time, or if you need to hydrate a fellow “bugger outer.”  A quality, water filtration straw would be an invaluable piece of kit if you’re near any fresh water source.
  2. Fire.  No matter where you are on planet earth, fire and the ability to make fire is crucial for survival.  Fire offers warmth, light, and will help you dry out wet clothing.  Fire allows you sterilize things, including water, and allows you to signal other people who might be trying to find you.  I recommend having no less than three fire making devices in your bag, and at least two of them need to be waterproof.
  3. Light.  I believe in the old adage that “two is one and one is none – but three is better.”  When it comes to illuminating devices, you should have multiple.  Lights are another thing you shouldn’t buy cheaply.  Invest in at least one quality flashlight – bright but not big.  A small keychain light could also be useful, as you won’t always need a lot of illumination.  Consider making one of your lights a headlamp because it will allow you to work hands-free.  A tinted light that won’t ruin your night vision (red or green) would be helpful in certain applications too.  Having extra batteries for any battery powered device in your pack is just plain smart.  The trade off here is that batteries get heavier the bigger they get.  Consider carrying devices that accept smaller batteries, and perhaps use devices that all take the same size batteries.  Continuity can make things easier.
  4. A jacket – preferably one that’s hooded and water repellent.  Because you might get rained on, duh.  A survival poncho or two wouldn’t hurt either.  They’re super light, compact, and can also work as a makeshift, temporary shelter if you opt not to pack a whole tarp.
  5. A knife.  Nay, two knives – a big hearty one and a small one.  The big one is for big jobs like hacking, chopping, and digging – the small one is for more tedious tasks.  The role of a quality knife in any survival situation cannot be overstated.
  6. Medical gear!  A trauma kit is an absolute must have!

You should consider food items too – particularly stuff that has very high caloric content and that will stay fresh for months at a time – until you remember to go through your bag and rotate the inventory.  Wireless battery packs for charging devices like cell phones and GPS units can be game changers.  Just don’t forget a charging cable or the battery pack will be worthless.  Some heavy-duty twine or 550 cord could prove helpful in an emergency and won’t add much weight to the kit.  Cash?  Sure, why not?  That stuff could come in handy assuming society hasn’t collapsed.  A spare magazine, OR TWO for your everyday carry pistol, which should already be on your person, not in your bag – or if you intend to bug out with a rifle because the commies are taking over, some extra ammo for that ol’ girl wouldn’t hurt either.  Lastly, it probably wouldn’t hurt to have an extra pair of socks and plenty of band aids.  Blisters are real, yo.

Look, I’m not a “survivalist” in the truest sense of the word, but I do have a good understanding of what the human body needs to survive.  When packing your bag, pack for conditions that you’re most likely to encounter and make additions using common sense.  Just be sure to leave empty space in your pack should you find something along your way that you need to carry with you.  Ounces equal pounds and pounds equal pain.  Treading the fine line between necessity and overkill can be tough.  I’m still figuring it out myself.  I challenge you to start somewhere, and if nothing else be a little more prepared tomorrow than you are today.  Until next week… 

Avoid what you can.  Defeat what you can’t.

-Ryan 

Please submit your questions to Ryan via email at Ryan@9and1tactical.com 

(Ryan Barnette is not a licensed attorney and no information provided in “Slicing the Pie” or any other publication authored by Ryan Barnette should be construed, in any way, as official, legal advice.)


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Natchitoches Pot Pie

Our family is on the road a lot for ball and school activities.  We all are thrilled when we realize we are on I-49 and, “Oh!  We can stop at the French Market in Natchitoches for meat pies!”  (I have definitely rubbed my foodie loving vibes onto my children).  We like their meat pies as well as their crawfish pies.  

When I came across this recipe for a Natchitoches meat pie in pot pie form I knew I had to make it.  It was definitely delicious and was so easy because you cooked everything in one skillet.  You can even prep the meat mixture ahead and spread into the skillet to bake later if you needed.  What a beauty!  Enjoy!

Ingredients:

  • 1 pound ground beef
  • 1 pound ground pork
  • 1 bunch diced green onion
  • 1 small yellow onion
  • 1 small green bell pepper
  • 4 cloves garlic, minced
  • 1/3 cup flour
  • 2 teaspoons cajun seasoning
  • 1 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
  • 1/8 teaspoon crushed red pepper
  • 1 cup beef broth
  • 1 tablespoon Worcestershire
  • 1 teaspoon hot sauce
  • 1 box frozen puff pastry, thawed
  • 1 egg, lightly beaten
  • Flaked sea salt

Directions

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.  In a 10” cast iron skillet, cook and crumble the ground beef and pork.  When the meat is almost done, add the green onions, onion, bell pepper, and garlic.  Cook on low until veggies are tender.  

Stir in flour, cajun seasoning, kosher salt, black pepper and red pepper.  Stir 1 minute.  Gradually pour in broth, Worcestershire, and hot sauce.  Cook until thickened, 5-7 minutes. 

Cut puff pastry into squares and layer in a shingle manner by starting at the edges and working toward the center.  Brush with egg and sprinkle with sea salt.

Bake until golden brown and puffed, 20ish minutes.

(Ashley Madden Rowton is a wife, mom and published cookbook author who lives in Minden, La.)


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Today in History – March 10

0241 BC – The Roman fleet sank 50 Carthaginian ships in the Battle of Aegusa.

1496 – Christopher Columbus concluded his second visit to the Western Hemisphere when he left Hispaniola for Spain.

1629 – England’s King Charles I dissolved Parliament and did not call it back for 11 years.

1656 – In the American colony of Virginia, suffrage was extended to all free men regardless of their religion.

1785 – Thomas Jefferson was appointed minister to France. He succeeded Benjamin Franklin.

1792 – John Stone patented the pile driver.

1804 – The formal ceremonies transferring the Louisiana Purchase from France to the U.S. took place in St. Louis.

1806 – The Dutch in Cape Town, South Africa surrendered to the British.

1814 – In France, Napoleon Bonaparte was defeated by a combined Allied Army at the battle of Laon.

1848 – The U.S. Senate ratified the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo, which ended the war with Mexico.

1849 – Abraham Lincoln applied for a patent for a device to lift vessels over shoals by means of inflated cylinders.

1864 – Ulysses S. Grant became commander of the Union armies in the U.S. Civil War.

1876 – Alexander Graham Bell made the first successful call with the telephone. He spoke the words “Mr. Watson, come here, I want to see you.”

1880 – The Salvation Army arrived in the U.S. from England.

1893 – New Mexico State University canceled its first graduation ceremony because the only graduate was robbed and killed the night before.

1894 – New York Gov. Roswell P. Flower signed the nation’s first dog-licensing law.

1902 – The Boers of South Africa scored their last victory over the British, when they captured British General Methuen and 200 men.

1902 – Tochangri, Turkey, was entirely wiped out by an earthquake.

1902 – U.S. Attorney General Philander Knox announced that a suit was being brought against Morgan and Harriman’s Northern Securities Company. The suit was enforcement of the Sherman Antitrust Act. Northern Securities loss in court was upheld by the U.S. Supreme Court on March 14, 1904.

1903 – Harry C. Gammeter patented the multigraph duplicating machine.

1903 – In New York’s harbor, the disease-stricken ship Karmania was quarantined with six dead from cholera.

1906 – In France, 1,200 miners were buried in an explosion at Courrieres.

1909 – Britain extracted territorial concessions from Siam and Malaya.

1910 – Slavery was abolished in China.

1912 – China became a republic after the overthrow of the Manchu Ch’ing Dynasty.

1913 – William Knox rolled the first perfect 300 game in tournament competition.

1924 – The U.S. Supreme Court upheld a New York state law forbidding late-night work for women.

1927 – Prussia lifted its Nazi ban allowing Adolf Hitler to speak in public.

1933 – Nevada became the first U.S. state to regulate drugs.

1940 – W2XBS-TV in New York City aired the first televised opera as it presented scenes from “I Pagliacci”.

1941 – The Brooklyn Dodgers announced that their players would begin wearing batting helmets during the 1941 season.

1941 – Vichy France threatened to use its navy unless Britain allowed food to reach France.

1944 – The Irish refused to oust all Axis envoys and denied the accusation of spying on Allied troops.

1945 – American B-29 bombers attacked Tokyo, Japan, 100,000 were killed.

1947 – The Big Four met in Moscow to discuss the future of Germany.

1947 – Poland and Czechoslovakia signed a 20-year mutual aid pact.

1949 – Nazi wartime broadcaster Mildred E. Gillars, also known as “Axis Sally,” was convicted in Washington, DC. Gillars was convicted of treason and served 12 years in prison.

1953 – North Korean gunners at Wonsan fired upon the USS Missouri. The ship responded by firing 998 rounds at the enemy position.

1955 – The last broadcast of “The Silver Eagle” was heard on radio.

1956 – Julie Andrews at the age of 23 made her TV debut in “High Tor” with Bing Crosby and Nancy Olson.

1959 – “Sweet Bird of Youth”, a play by Tennessee Williams, opened in New York City.

1965 – Walter Matthau and Art Carney opened in “The Odd Couple”. It later became a hit on television.

1966 – The North Vietnamese captured a Green Beret camp at Ashau Valley.

1966 – France withdrew from NATO’s military command to protest U.S. dominance of the alliance and asked NATO to move its headquarters from Paris.

1969 – James Earl Ray pled guilty in Memphis, TN, to the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr. Ray later repudiated the guilty plea and maintained his innocence until his death in April of 1998.

1971 – The U.S. Senate approved an amendment to lower the voting age to 18.

1975 – The North Vietnamese Army attacked the South Vietnamese town of Ban Me Thout.

1980 – Iran’s leader, Ayatollah Khomeini, lent his support to the militants holding American hostages in Tehran.

1981 – The U.S. Postal Service announced an increase in first class postage from 15 to 18 cents.

1982 – The U.S. banned Libyan oil imports due to their continued support of terrorism.

1986 – The Wrigley Company, of Chicago, raised the price of its seven-stick pack of Wrigley’s chewing gum from a quarter to 30 cents.

1987 – The Vatican condemned surrogate parenting as well as test-tube and artificial insemination.

1990 – Haitian President Prosper Avril was ousted 18 months after seizing power in a coup.

1991 – “Phase Echo” began. It was the operation to withdraw 540,000 U.S. troops from the Persian Gulf region.

1994 – White House officials began testifying before a federal grand jury about the Whitewater controversy.

1995 – U.S. Secretary of State Warren Christopher told Yasser Arafat that he must do more to curb Palestinian terrorists.

1998 – U.S. troops in the Persian Gulf began receiving the first vaccinations against anthrax.

2002 – The Associated Press reported that the Pentagon informed the U.S. Congress in January that it was making contingency plans for the possible use of nuclear weapons against countries that threaten the U.S. with weapons of mass destruction, including Iraq and North Korea.

2003 – North Korea test-fired a short-range missile. The event was one of several in a patter of unusual military maneuvers.


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Upcoming Events

Please send all non-profit events to bpjnewsla@gmail.com

March 10 (9 a.m.)

Ringgold Community Blood Drive

March 13-17 (3:45 p.m. – 5 p.m.)

Dr. Seuss After School Special – Bienville Parish Library

March 11 (12:30 p.m.)

Michael Ryder Memorial Blood Drive – Backwoods Venue in Brewton’s Mills, La.

March 16 (11 a.m.)

Arcadia Office of Motor Vehicles Grand Re-opening, 600 Factory Outlet Drive, Suite 8 in Arcadia, La

March 16 (6:30 p.m.)

Alumni Basketball Games – Mt. Olive Christian School

March 18 (1 – 3 p.m.)

Town-Wide Clean Up Day

Meet at Ringgold High School Softball Field

March 21-23 (9 a.m- 2 p.m.)

LSU AgCenter – Spring Youth Culinary Camp- Hawaiian Luau, Restaurant Copycat and Campfire Meals

$25 per class or $60 for all 3

Call 318-263-7400 to register 

March 24

Fourth Friday Fish Fry – Camp Harris, 2800 Camp Harris Road Minden, La

Tickets are available for pre-purchase at participating churches and camp office.

March 24-25 

Kingsway Baptist Church Annual 3 on 3 Basketball Tournament

Southland Camp Gym, 3555 Hwy 371 in Ringgold, La

$25 per team to register and includes tournament shirt for each player.

Contact: 418-453-8154 to sign-up. 

March 25 (11 a.m. to 1 p.m.)

Hot & Tasty Fish Fry hosted by Arcadia- Bienville NAACP – Mt. Calvary Family Life Center

$12 per plate

March 26 (10:15 a.m.)

Women’s History Month Guest Speaker: Dr. Phyllis Mason – Holland Grove Baptist Church

April 1 

Camp Harris 4- Person Scramble Golf Tournament – Trails End Golf Course in Arcadia, La

To sign up please contact the camp office at 927-3706, Camp Manager Harry at 455-5012 or Tournament Director Michael at 458-6100.

April 1 (9 a.m. – 1 p.m.)

Farmer’s Market in Downtown Arcadia

$20 donation to reserve a vendor spot. (Food related items only)

Call Tamara at 318-579-0310 to sign up.

April 1 (9 a.m. – 1 p.m.)

Castor Farmer’s Market – Castor Rails to Trail Pavilion 


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Notice of Death – March 9


Louise Courtney

Nov. 29, 1929 – March 6, 2023

Arcadia, La.

Visitation: 9 a.m. until 2 p.m. Saturday, March 11, 2023, Rose-Neath Funeral Home, Arcadia, La.

Funeral service: 2 p.m., immediately following visitation.

Burial: Mt. Lebanon Cemetery.

Joe Bill Gamble

Dec. 7, 1954 – March 6, 2023

Doyline/Minden

Memoria service: 3 p.m. Thursday, March 16, 2023, VFW Hunter-Rickerson Post #2885, 232 Horseshoe Loop, Doyline, La.

Charles Burge

Nov. 19, 1954 – March 4, 2023

Springhill, La.

Private memorial service at a later date.

John Darrin Manahan

August 3, 11965 – March 4, 2023

Ringgold, La.

Visitation: 5 until 7 p.m. Sunday, March 12, 2023, Kilpatrick’s Rose-Neath Funeral Home Coushatta Chapel.

Graveside service: 10 a.m. Monday, March 13, 2023, Social Springs Cemetery, Ringgold.

Frances Gladney Hays Bays

March 3, 1938 – March 8, 2023

Homer, La.

Born: Bienville Parish

Visitation: 5:30 – 7:30 p.m. Friday, March 10, 2023, Kilpatrick’s Rose-Neath Funeral Home, Homer.

Funeral service: 10 a.m. Saturday, March 11, 2023, First Presbyterian Church, Homer.

Bienville Parish Journal publishes paid complete obituaries – unlimited words and a photo, as well as unlimited access – $80. Contact your funeral provider or bpjnewsla@gmail.com . Must be paid in advance of publication. (Above death notices are free of charge.)

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Sneed honored for accomplishments

Rep. Patrick Jefferson of Gibsland (left) reads proclamation by Gov. John Bel Edwards

By Bonnie Culverhouse

His name is L’Jarius Sneed. He also goes by L-Jay. His closest friends call him J.J.

Now, he is known as Super Bowl champion and Hometown Hero.

Sneed, a Minden High School and Louisiana Tech graduate was Grand Marshal of a parade through downtown Minden Saturday. Sneed then signed autographs for a huge crowd of fans in the parking lot of the Webster Parish Courthouse where he was joined by his parents and brother.

Event coordinator Michael Walker said he is unsure the number of people who attended Saturday.

“We had 1,000 hot dogs to sell, and we ran out,” Walker said. “Some people said they didn’t get one.”

District 11 state Representative Patrick Jefferson of Gibsland read a proclamation signed by Gov. John Bel Edwards.

“You are an inspiration to throngs of young people who aspire to reach and conquer the grandest of stages,” Jefferson said.

Minden Mayor Nick Cox proclaimed Saturday, March 4, 2023 L’Jarius Sneed Day before presenting Sneed with a key to the city.

“We reflect on his many accomplishments, to have made a positive impact on this community,” Cox said.

All of the speakers lauded Sneed’s ability to come back from adversity to make a name for himself and his roots.

“Never give up on your children,” his mother Jane said. “Just pray to God every day and cover them with Him.”

Spencer Heard, Sneed’s coach at Minden High School, said he always knew his player would be something special.

“Life is not a straight line,” Heard said. “It’s got curves, it’s got hills and it’s got valleys, but L’Jarius is about perseverance.”

Following the Super Bowl, Sneed was the recipient of the NFL Way to Play for his tackle on Philadelphia Eagles running back Miles Sanders during the game. Sneed chose the Minden Crimson Tide to donate his $5,000 award.

A representative from Louisiana Tech University spoke about Sneed’s time in college. His mother said there was a time when Sneed wanted to leave college, but he stayed with it.

Sneed seemed humble during the program. He applauded for everyone except himself.

A police contingency surrounded Sneed throughout the parade and during his time with fans and signing autographs. There were many excited children and young people pushing their way to the front to see a hero, and he interacted with them, tossing a football with a couple of them.

“I appreciate you giving me this honor, and the police staff that is with me,” Sneed said to cheers from the crowd. “Y’all could’ve been somewhere else doing anything else, man.”


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Police arrest alleged shoplifter, accomplice

By Bonnie Culverhouse

Minden Police have arrested a woman for shoplifting at a local dollar store and her accomplice from Bienville Parish.

Latasha Bittle, 27, no address given, was taken into custody Saturday evening, along with a Gibsland man who was serving as her “look out.”

Bittle was arrested for theft and Thaddeus Smith, 43, of the 13,000 block of Hwy. 154, Gibsland, is charged with principal to theft.

Minden Police Chief Jared McIver said Sgt. Mitch Hackett, Lt. Brandon Curry and Ofc. Anthony Miller were dispatched to the local store in reference to theft.

“Officer heard Smith telling Bittle to hurry up and come on,” McIver said.  “He was acting as the look out for Bittle while she was concealing items to steal from the store in a black backpack.”

McIver said contact was made with Bittle and she gave consent to search the backpack.

“She also admitted to concealing unpaid items from the store in the bag, and multiple unpaid items were located in the bag,” said the chief. “The total of the items was more than 12 dollars. The store wanted to press charges against Bittle and Smith and signed a complaint.”

Both parties were transported to Minden Police Department where they were booked and placed in holding cells. Bittle was reportedly unable to make bond and was later transported to Bayou Dorcheat Correctional Center.

This information has been provided by a law enforcement agency as public information. Persons named as suspects in a criminal investigation, or arrested and charged with a crime, have not been convicted of any criminal offense and are presumed innocent until proven guilty in a court of law.


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Gibsland-Coleman Bulldogs defeated by Zwolle Hawks

Photo courtesy of Gibsland-Coleman High School Facebook page.

By Paige Nash

It has been an eventful week for the Gibsland-Coleman Bulldogs. Last Friday, March 3, they went up against the number 5 ranked team, the Lacassine Cardinals in the quarterfinal round of the Division V Boy’s Basketball State Championship. The Bulldogs pulled a close win, 75-71 at their home court. 

On Monday, March 6, the team, students and fans traveled to Lake Charles to watch as the boys went up against the number one seed, the Zwolle Hawks, in the semifinal round. The Bulldogs led at the end of the first quarter, 13-3 and the second quarter, 27-24. They trailed by one point of the Hawks by the end of the third quarter, 44-43. The game went into double overtime where the Hawks were able to establish a small lead, ending the game and the season for the Bulldogs, 81-72. 

Also, competing in the semifinal bracket on Monday evening, were the number 2 ranked team, the Anacoco Indians, and the number 3 ranked Fairview Panthers. The Indians won their bracket game, 63-49. They will be playing the Zwolle Hawks for the Division V (Non-select) Boy’s State Championship title this Friday, March 10 at 8 p.m. at the Burton Colosseum in Lake Charles.  


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Open Enrollment for Preschool in Bienville Parish

The Bienville Parish Early Childhood Community Network Presents the Preschool Round-up Registration Open Enrollment for the year 2023-2024. The registration will take place April 12- April 14.

Pre-K 3 registration will be held at Bienville High School from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Thursday, April 13 and from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Friday, April 14. Children must be 3 years old on or before September 30, 2023 for Pre-K 3 programs. All parents looking to register their child must call Bienville High School to set up an appointment. Parents will fill out applications forms during their appointment time and will need to bring proof of income, child’s birth certificate, immunization records, social security card, two proofs of residence with parent or guardian’s name and driver’s licence or state issued identification. 

Pre-K 4 registration will be from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Wednesday, April 12 and Thursday, April 13. Parents may also register their child for Pre-K 4 programs on Friday, April 14 from 8 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. Children must be 4 years old on or before September 30, 2023. Parents will need to contact the school that you would like your child to attend that is located within your attendance zone to make an appointment for registration. Parents will fill out applications forms during their appointment time and will need to bring proof of income, child’s birth certificate, immunization records, social security card, two proofs of residence with parent or guardian’s name and driver’s licence or state issued identification. 

The BPSB is asking that you bring only the child that is being registered for the preschool programs to the appointment. 

For more information regarding required documents or any other questions please contact Preschool Coordinator Daphne Mathis at dapne.mathis@bpsb.us or 318-263-2244.


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Tourists from the four-state region welcomed the arrival of Spring

Tourists visiting the Sylvan Retreat along the Jonquil Jubilee’s Homes and Garden tour.

By Paige Nash 

Crowds gathered in Gibsland on Saturday, March 4, to celebrate the arrival of Spring. The Jonquil Jubilee is an annual event held on the first Saturday of March. 

Gibsland Jonquil Jubilee representative Barbara Johnson said, “We had a very large, friendly crowd turnout to enjoy the beautiful weather, the tour stops, shopping with vendors, good food, and seeing old and new friends.” 

The event kicked off that morning with a pancake breakfast organized by the local Lion’s Club. After attendees filled their bellies, they were able to spread out through downtown and shop with local vendors who had an array of merchandise available to purchase, from clothes, books, homemade candles, jewelry, paintings, quilts and more.  

“Attendees came from the four-state area,” said Johnson. “One came from Maryland. She had lots of fun with her family.”       

Horticulturist Greg Grant was the featured speaker. His event was highly informative, speaking about the Daffodil plant also classified as a Narcissus. The Daffodil is the highlight for many jubilee goers.  

A stop on the Home and Garden’s tour was Sally’s Field where photographers set up to take photos for this year’s visitors, among the flowers. This field was located right next to this year’s main attraction- The Sylvan Retreat.  

Ancestors of the original owners of the home, Lestar and Sally Martin, welcomed group after group into their home, where they received a guided, history rich tour throughout the property that was built in 1848. 

Before wrapping up the event the raffle winners were announced with Jim Johnson winning the 500 daffodil bulbs, Margaret Salter taking home the t-shirt quilt and Mary Gamble winning and coveted Jubilee quilt.  

Proceeds raised from visitors attending the Home and Gardens tour, as well as buying tickets for the raffles with benefit the Jonquil Jubilee in the upcoming years, as well as community revitalization projects.


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Saline Bobcats Varsity fell behind early to the St. Mary Tigers

Photo courtesy of Chuck Dison

Saline Varsity Bobcats fell behind early and couldn’t come back in an 11-1 loss to St. Mary Varsity Tigers on Tuesday, March 7.

St. Mary Varsity Tigers scored on a single by Braylon Normand, a single by Conor Jordan, a single by Trey Scarborough, and a stolen base by Payne Williams RHP in the first inning.

The Saline Varsity Bobcats struggled to contain the high-powered offense of St. Mary Varsity Tigers, giving up 11 runs.

St. Mary Varsity Tigers got things started in the first inning when Normand singled on a 3-2 count, scoring one run.

Scarborough was on the pitcher’s mound for St. Mary Varsity Tigers. Scarborough lasted two innings, allowing three hits and one run while striking out four and walking zero.

Jacob Jones started the game for Saline Varsity Bobcats. The pitcher surrendered six runs on four hits over one inning, striking out one. Kenton Lee Crawford threw three innings in relief.

Bryce Davis, Gunner Fontenot, and Braxton Davis each collected one hit to lead Saline Varsity Bobcats.

Scarborough went 2-for-3 at the plate to lead St. Mary Varsity Tigers in hits. St. Mary Varsity Tigers tore up the base paths, as two players stole at least two bases. Drake Griffin led the way with three.

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Ringgold Redskins Varsity team shut out by Northwood Gators

Ringgold Varsity Redskins fell behind early and couldn’t come back in an 18-0 loss to Northwood Varsity Gators on Tuesday. Northwood Varsity Gators took the lead on a walk in the first inning.

The Ringgold Varsity Redskins struggled to contain the high-powered offense of Northwood Varsity Gators, giving up 18 runs.

In the first inning, Northwood Varsity Gators got their offense started. #21 drew a walk, scoring one run.

A single by Andre Ivory in the fourth inning was a positive for Ringgold Varsity Redskins.

#7 led the Northwood Varsity Gators to victory on the mound. The hurler surrendered zero runs on zero hits over three innings, striking out seven and walking zero. #1 threw one inning in relief out of the bullpen.

Jarred Durr took the loss for Ringgold Varsity Redskins. The bulldog went two and a third innings, allowing 11 runs on seven hits and striking out two.

Jyshawn Marshall and Ivory all had one hit to lead Ringgold Varsity Redskins.

Northwood Varsity Gators collected 12 hits. #1, #4, and #3 each managed multiple hits for Northwood Varsity Gators. Northwood Varsity Gators didn’t commit a single error in the field. #10 had the most chances in the field with eight. Northwood Varsity Gators tore up the base paths, as three players stole at least two bases. #7 led the way with three.

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Getting to the other side of a river of filth

I’ve been thinking.

It’s that kind of thinking you do on a deep and personal level when the world may seem just a bit too much to handle. This kind of thinking is usually accompanied by the “mirror talk” that I’ve written about in the past.

I’ve been trending negative due to spending too much time on social media. In truth, I’d like to eliminate all my social sites, but being in the communication dissemination business means you’ve got to stay relatively connected. So, I’ve been keeping up with posts to see if any human-interest, feel-good stories can be shared for the Webster Parish Journal. I don’t like going on social media. In fact, I loathe it. Just despise social media. You see, for all the good it does, there’s a whole lotta bad. People are just cruel to one another. Local people. People you know. Neighbors. Folks you go to church with. These aren’t folks out there in places far away that I’m writing about.

It was starting to affect me a little. I wanted to make a few remarks. I didn’t because it wouldn’t change anyone’s mind and only cause problems. So, I just unfollowed. I’ve been doing that a lot lately as well. Unfollowing and thinking. And in my self-reflection, I came to the realization that America’s greatest single problem is a lack of empathy. Social media just makes it too easy to be rude, to say things when we’re angry that can’t be taken back. Toothpaste can’t go back into the tube. 

A favorite quote of mine is that the internet has made a lot of us way too comfortable disrespecting people and not getting punched in the mouth for it. As a friend told me, we all need to think about the effect our posts can have on the lives of others. I just don’t think we do. I know I haven’t in the past. 

I’m going to stay on social media. I have to because I chose to go back to a world where I need to know what’s going on so I can share the GOOD in our lives even though it means wading through a river of filth. What we can forget, digitally and face to face, is everyone you know – and have problems with – is a person the same as you. These digital enemies of yours have good days and bad days and fears and hopes and desires. Nine billion of us. And I like to think very few of us mean to harm others as we go about our lives. 

So, I have just one hope this Monday evening. One prayer to the Higher Power who gives me nudges when I need them and love that I’ve done nothing to earn. Help me and help all of us to see people for who they are – uncertain and alone, cold in the dark without each other – rather than what we’ve made them out to be – obstacles and merchants of pain standing in our paths to happiness.

Help us always remember the Word – “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Just a thought on a Monday evening.

(Josh Beavers is a teacher and a writer. He has been recognized five times by the Louisiana Press Association for excellence in opinion writing.)


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Crime and Punishment

Since the earliest humans roamed the Earth, theft has been a problem.  I imagine one caveman being envious of another caveman’s club and taking it when the opportunity presented itself.      Over the millennia, humans developed rules which eventually became enforceable laws to stave off thievery.  In some cases, the penalty for theft was excessive in comparison to the value of what was stolen.  In 2019, a man convicted of theft in Iran had four of the fingers on his right hand cut off.

In early November 1906, a boy whose name has been lost to history spied some “penny toys” dangling from the doorway of a shop in Weinfelden, Switzerland.  Without much thought of the possible consequences, the boy seized two of the penny toys and simply walked away.  The boy made no attempt to hide the stolen toys, nor did he rush away from the scene of the crime.  He calmly strode away from the shop. 

The shop’s clerk contacted a policeman and reported the crime.  The clerk pointed in the direction the boy had walked.  With the help of the public who, like the clerk, pointed in the direction the boy had walked, the policeman quickly made his way to the boy’s home.  The boy’s parents were unaware of the boy’s new toys until the policeman arrived.  The policeman questioned the boy who laughingly admitted to taking the penny toys.  With a solid confession, the policeman arrested the boy. 

When the theft case came before the Weinfelden magistrate, the policeman held the boy up so the magistrate could take a good look at him and so the boy could see the official, as well.  When the magistrate asked the boy if he had taken the penny toys, the boy laughingly admitted to the crime just as he had done with the policeman.  The boy tried as well as he could to defend his actions.  He tried to explain to the magistrate that he did not have any toys like the other boys in his neighborhood.  The magistrate was unaffected by the boys attempt to explain away his crime, and as sternly as if he were facing the most cold-blooded of murderers loudly proclaimed “three and a half months’ imprisonment.”

The boy’s parents, shocked by the prison sentence for a couple of penny toys, fell on their knees and pleaded with the magistrate to reconsider.  As the boy had openly confessed to thievery, the boy’s parents had just one argument, that the boy did not know the difference between right and wrong.  With hardly a glance in their direction, the magistrate sternly told the policeman, “Remove the prisoner.”  The policeman seemed almost as shocked as the parents, but he had to abide by the magistrate’s order.  The policeman led the boy to an equally astonished warden to begin his sentence. 

Whether the boy’s imprisonment deterred him from a life of crime is unknown.  It is possible that the boy did not remember the incident.  You see, the boy who was sentenced to three and a half months imprisonment for the theft of two penny toys, had recently had a birthday.  He had just turned three years old.

Source:

1.      The Minneapolis Journal, November 18, 1906, p.1.

2.     “Iran cuts off man’s fingers for theft,” BBC News, October 25, 2019,  https://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-50179741.


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Ask the Paperboy, Chapter 60: Daylight Saving Time Edition

Dear Ask the Paperboy:

Last year during early March, the U.S. Senate passed legislation that would have made daylight saving time permanent starting this Sunday, March 12. But now I understand that although we will spring forward Sunday, we will fall back come November 5, same as always, Lord willing we are still here. Right? Wrong? Let me know before Sunday. You’re on the clock starting … now!

Sleepily in Shreveport

Dear Sleepy,

Yes, to the first part; Congress considered making daylight saving time permanent, but it didn’t hap’n, Cap’n. Last year at this time, the proposed legislation went from the Senate to the House and the House was locked. By the time someone found a key, everyone in the House was in a foul mood and said NEG, that they “needed more time” to study its effects one way or the other because, apparently, the 100 years that daylight saving time has been around has not been enough time to really and truly think this thing through. Paperboy wishes daylight saving time were permanent because then it would be Headache Saving Time, since Paperboy’s head is all “confrused” twice a year. Finally, the bill was reintroduced by a senator just last week, has bipartisan support, and has been referred to the Committee on Commerce, Science, Transportation, Headaches, and Clocks. My sources tell me the biggest thing we in the Don’t Touch That Timepiece! lobby have going for us is support in the extremely partisan cow bloc, made up of bovines who don’t want to be milked at one time during March and another time during November. Who would? Cows don’t know a clock from an udder; they just know when the sun comes up. Cows keep life simple.

Dear Ask the Paperboy,

I see the Tarbutton Road Exit has opened in Lincoln Parish and a Buc-ee’s is a-comin’. This is the biggest news in these parts since Whataburger opened. But my query is, why is it called Tarbutton Road?

Life in Lincoln

Dear Life,

Paperboy feels it had to have been the name of someone who lived on that road before it had a name. As is often the custom in rural America, the name of the road, and sometimes a parish or town, is named for the early bird. You snooze, you lose. There are no Tarbuttons around now that I know of, but there are plenty in Texas and Mississippi and, with a name like that, they are all cool. My friend Teddy Allen feels if he’d have been named Teddy Simonetti or Teddy Takata or Teddy Tarbutton, he would have gotten some respect. Great names. They bring something to the party. Plus, it’s a fine road and a top-shelf exit. Hat tippage.

Dear ATP,

Recently my favorite baseball player was in a slump and then he hit like two taters and knocked in more runs than you have fingers on your hand in one game. The announcer said he was “off the schneid.” Is this a sports term? A foreign language? Did I misunderstand?

Possibly taking this too personally,

J.T. Schneider, Schneider Road, Schneiderville

Dear J.T.,

Words have always amused Paperboy, even ever since he was just Paperbaby. A “schneid,” as it turns out, is a word that originated with gin rummy and means you lost that hand and didn’t score any points. So, a schneid is a bad thing and came to mean, in any sport, that it is not happening for you. To get “off the schneid” means you are winning again. So, if you see a schneid, stay away from it. If you’re on a schneid, say excuse me and get off it. Now that that’s settled, let’s score some runs!

Contact Teddy at teddy@latech.edu or Twitter @MamaLuvsManning


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